Dear L

I miss our hugs in bed when I come up late and find I’ve left it too long because the day has grabbed you and taken you to another world. I miss our little saying or hearing you say you love me when you fall asleep. The places we would meet in our dreams and our little kisses.

I miss our intimacy angel. It’s beginning to affect me. You know what I mean, not just making love but all the little things that we would do. Cheeky kisses, bum gropes little nibbles here and there.

I can’t sleep very well because of things that go through my head, thinking of ways to help the pain,the fatigue, energy levels. I scroll through sites upon sites on hope for some remedy but I am yet to find one.

I do love you, I love you very much. I don’t feel like I’m wanted very much at the moment. Hopefully it will get better.

Sweet dreams angel.

Always yours

T. Xx

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Dear L

Hello my love,

I’m so selfish for just thinking of me while you’re going through this worse than me. Here I am asking you if you still find me attractive because you don’t touch me the way you once did. I understand to an extent,I’d be lying if I said I totally got it,but that’s my brain for you. I’m not wired the same am I?? I’m so wary about holding you wrong or hurting you that I am a little worried to come close I case I hurt you. I miss our silly days, I know you do too. Don’t mind the taking it slow, I’ve got to come off the fast lane some time. I just hadn’t anticipated how quick things would progress with your illness. I’d hoped for a little more time to be more sporadic I guess.

I worry that reading this might upset you. It isn’t meant too, I’m lay here with so much flying though my mind I need to let it out. We are so quiet around one another lately. Its all just happened so fast angel.

I won’t leave you, I’m here for good, I’m just feeling quite unseen at the moment but il get over it I know I will.

I love you angel. Sweet dreams xx

Always yours

T xx

Can you be too positive about life and things in it?

Do you ever wonder if you can be too positive about things?

Always trying to help others see the best of things?

Be overly appreciative of the simple things in life to just keep being knocked back down?

How can you stay being positive in a world where negativity spreads like a wild fire?

How do you find more energy to put out a flame of negativity with a positive spin to just have another bush reignited further down?

Do you carry on or do you give in and succumb to the world and the thinking of the people in it?

What would you do? If being positive is the only thing that keeps you smiling and keeps your mind away from the darkness of the thoughts that haunt you but you are around people who try and point out the other side of the storm?

Being a rainbow it’s hard to keep my colours shining brightly when there is a storm just around the corner.

Hello 👋

Good morning or good evening or goodnight to you lovely blogger sphere. I hope you have had a wonderful weekend. Weekend for us has been alright. We have both been a little quiet and subdued. L got diagnosed with fibromyalgia though we have known for a while that she had it. The doctors have put her on a medication called amitriptoline. Not sure if that’s how you spell it but it’s a funny old medication. It’s left her feeling spacey and well as though her own body isn’t hers. And extra sleepy. She’s been trying to find the best time to take it so it doesn’t make her groggy for when she has to go to work. I’m not on any medication and I always feel groggy when I realise I’m off to work. Haha!

We have our beautiful furry baby with us for a week now. He isn’t too well. Has allergies so he’s had a lovely medicated shower,ear drops and his tablets in his brand new food. He is beautiful. Brings so much happiness to L when he’s here. A happiness only a four leggged friend can bring. We have been going to the sun beds lately in preparation for when we go to Gran Canaria is August. So we are ready for the sunshine! Last time I went on the sunbeds I never tanned when I went away. So we will see how this goes 😊

I said something I regretted yesterday to L. With all with what’s going on at the moment my thoughts had been going to whether or not having a baby in the future was a wise thing to do.. anyway my tummy was bloated after dinner of some meat and I always look like I’m about six months gone. So L said oh you have a meat baby to which my response was it’s the only baby that’s going to be in there. Looking back it was insensitive and I know I hurt Ls feelings. I shouldn’t of said it and it was wrong of me. So L if you read this. I’m sorry xx

Have a wonderful day whatever everyone gets up to.

Take care

Love always T xx

Saturday strolling

Helloo❤️ I know I haven’t posted much lately but with it being the Easter holidays I try to spend as much time with the family as I can and being stuck behind a screen isn’t one thing I’d like to do when I don’t feel I get enough time to enjoy with my family as it is.

Well il give you a two week catch up blog. We went to spend some time with Ls family after the Easter bank holiday. We had a lovely time. The children got on well and I got to know Ls parents and sister a bit more. We did do a blog on the monkey forest which I’m sure you would of seen. We came back home and had hospital appointment for my daughters cast to be removed.

This was her celebratory dinner for having her cast removed. I caught up with a friend just before her appointment and had a lovely chat with her outside of work. That’s it isn’t it when you work along side someone even though you spend most of your day with them you don’t actually get a chance to talk to them about other things. I’m waffling I know haha

What else have we been up to? Well I got a new tattoo on my arm.

I have an excuse and more of a theme to connect all my tattoos together now with music notes. I am covered in butterflies. I see them as a symbol of transformation and being a free spirit.

We went to ikea and bought more storage boxes! My partner has got me so organised in the time I have got to know her. I mean we are always learning new things about one another but she has organised my chaotic brain and life.

I am very grateful for her!

We had a friend and her children over on Friday which is always nice. We do enjoy seeing her and the children and luckily my daughter has patience with them(more patience than she has with her own brother. Haha)

Today we went shopping for our sons birthday presents. He is 10 next Thursday! Ten years go very fast!! So that’s been done now. Then me and L made a lovely dinner of pan fried duck breast with homemade potato roasts but were small cubes really and friend mushrooms. L did a lovely sauce which really complimented the duck. It was delicious.

What am I doing now? Watching naked attraction and I’ve just weighed myself and I’m now 10st1. Just need to lose half a stone and get this firm tummy back again and firm up my ass and il feel happier again.

What’s been the highlight of your weekend?week?

Don’t forget the little things

Good day to everyone. I’ve been having a think about how easy it is to forget the little things you do to show you care or if someone is on your mind. Little things such as writing a little note or buying little keepsake things to show that at that moment in time they was on your mind.

Simple walks and appreciating the company you are in and showing your gratitude to them for being with them. Coffee or tea and a chat in a coffee show garden. Sitting together on a bench listening to the world around you and appreciating it.

Little kisses unexpectedly, those hugs when you are washing up or just brushing past your hand when your working.

All the little things that keep the romance alive and the fire and butterflies alive.

Never forget these things

Here’s what we have been up to today….

Happy Easter Sunday Wordpress

Happy Easter everyone. Hope that your day has been wonderful. Yesterday was a quiet day. Benji went for a lovely walk in the park and on the hills. I downloaded Pokémon go to see what the craze was. I’m not keen on walking around with my face behind a screen so I tend to use it every now and again. I’ve not a clue what I’m doing with it but I keep catching things haha.

L hasn’t been well bless her. I think her body has realised she’s off for work now and has decided to let a bug come out. Hopefully soon she will be able to enjoy the holidays.

We did some lovely hampers for the kids and grown ups for Easter.

How’s your day been?